i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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