The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
