I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Randomize
