help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hello my rib-scented angel!
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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