I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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