He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
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