me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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