Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
