TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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