so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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