Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
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