I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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