I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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