4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
