I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
