If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
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