she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
