do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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