I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
