Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
