Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Welp...herpes.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
