Whod you bang
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Randomize
