Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
