This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Randomize
