did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
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