The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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