Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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