i was born a porn star she said
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
