I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize