if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Randomize
