and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize