If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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