i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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