Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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