i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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