I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Drake has all the answers
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
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