So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Randomize
