People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
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