watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
why is half of my head shaved?
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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