i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Randomize
