She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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