I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Randomize
