I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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