is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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