I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
We got so high we made milksteak
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Randomize
