i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Randomize
