I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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