if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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