How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Randomize
