ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Randomize
